Maintaining relationships with children following divorce or separation

When parents split up questions about where and how any children will live come up. Children may want to know how will each parent get to spend time with them, and have lots of questions.

For instance, if a move away from one parent is going to happen, consider how best to make sure that your children will be able to share their growing up with both of you.

Maintaining contact, even in other ways that face-to-face, is also important. Children know that ‘family’ are the people who love and care for them rather than those they live with or spend time with regularly. For a child, knowing who both their parents are and being able to spend time with each of them is important. If you can’t spend time with your children, keep in touch in whatever way you can.

As a parent, it might seem easier to give up if you are being denied contact with your children. However, in the long run this can be unhelpful or destructive. Nearly all children want to know who their parents are. In fact, according to the Resolution website, children may not know or understand why you gave up on being in contact with them and may blame themselves.

There is no right or wrong way to talk to all children about separation, but resources and tips can help with suggestions.

Resolution’s helpful guide on maintaining child contact is accessible here.