Domestic abuse - where to access support
Domestic abuse can happen to anyone, regardless of age, background, gender, religion, sexuality or ethnicity. However, statistics show most domestic abuse is carried out by men and experienced by women.
Do you notice yourself changing your behaviour because you are frightened of your partner’s reactions?
Do you feel controlled, victimised, or isolated?
Domestic abuse is a pattern of behaviour on the part of the abuser designed to control their partner. It can happen at any point in a relationship, including after you have split up or divorced.
It is natural to hope that your partner will change, or that the abuse will stop and often an abusive partner will be very sorry after an incident of abuse.
However sadly the truth is that domestic abuse usually gets worse over time.
There are perpetrator programmes for those who want to take responsibility for their abuse and change their behaviour for good. However, as a survivor of domestic abuse it is important that you prioritise your safety and wellbeing, and that of your children.
Parents experiencing domestic abuse often try to shield their children from what is happening, for example, by playing it down or not speaking about it at all. However, despite these efforts, the reality is that most children are aware that something is ‘wrong’. As many as 90% of children are in the same room or in the next room when domestic abuse occurs. Children who experience domestic abuse in their household are likely to feel fear, worry, sadness and anger. Some children may bottle up their feelings, whilst others may act out.
Key Points
- Domestic abuse is never the fault of the person who is experiencing it.
- Domestic abuse is a crime. It is not an individual but a social problem and we all need to speak out against it.
Helplines and support resources to get help and advice:
Refuge operate a National Domestic Abuse Helpline (England) providing a 24 hour helpline offering support and advice on domestic abuse for women in England. It can put women in touch with local refuges. Call 0808 2000 247.
Men’s Advice Line Men’s Advice Line is a confidential helpline for male victims of domestic abuse and those supporting them. They offer advice and emotional support to men who experience abuse, and direct them to other vital services to help keep them and their children safe. Call 0808 801 0327.
GALOP is the UK’s LGBT+ anti-abuse charity. They work with and for LGBT+ victims and survivors of abuse and violence. National Helpline for LGBT+ Victims and Survivors of Abuse and Violence. Call 0800 999 5428
REMEMBER - If you are in immediate danger of being abused or you have been abused you should telephone the police immediately. Call 999. Your physical and mental health is worthy and worth protecting. Help is always available and you are not on your own.